There is no point in giving advice!

Yea.. there is no point in advising someone about how they should do something. More than that, we shouldn’t advice anyone at all – even if it is accepted and obeyed.

Because, each and every mind is unique and it has its own layers or filters of logic for understanding and perception. Its a unique combination which cannot be replicated. Even the physically alike twins have different minds. So, your experience – I mean your mind experience, your feelings are different from that of someone else in the same situation. The degree of pain or pleasure experienced by one mind is always different from another for the same condition.

So, what is the whole point of giving advices to people based on your experience or principles? All that you can do is, if you want to really help, just inform them based on your kno-how. It is then up to the individual and it becomes their responsibility to choose what they really want. You cannot tell them what they ‘want’!

In my opinion, this applies for everyone in all walks of life. Whether it is as important as choosing a career or a life partner or as simple as choosing an ice-cream flavor! 😉

And if you are going to advice people and push them to make decisions, then can you bear the responsibility for their life or their mind experience? Can you be 100% sure that they will be happy about it all the time in their life? And even if you say so, don’t you think the person has to develop responsibility for their life and make decisions for themselves rather depending on someone else for their life? Be it mother or father or friend or whom so ever it may be!

Either ways – I believe it is better to just to help some make an informed decision rather than to push them with advices!

Most importantly, I am not saying that we should not listen to advices. Of course we should! But use our own brain to analyze and choose what is good for us at that point of time based on the given / known information. Not just blindly follow some one’s advice.

There is a thin line of difference between
– telling some one what they should do or don’t do and
– telling some one what ‘can’ possibly happen if they do or don’t do something

and my point is, let us stay behind the line and stop with just informing others and not actually influencing them to make a particular decision!

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4 comments

  1. Balaji Krishnan · · Reply

    may be, after a certain age or maturity level – yes. but before a person reaches that level where he/she can make such informed decisions? matter of fact, i am forced to think that no matter how old we grow, how informed we become, there would still be things that’d lie beyond our line of experience 🙂 and imho, a good listener is most likely to succeed more times than a non-listener.

    1. It is bcoz of the very same reason – that no matter how old we grow, certain things will always lie beyond our line of experience or knowledge – I am saying that we shouldn’t advice someone! Advice is basically telling someone how/what they should do in a given circumstance. And I am saying who are we to say that to someone? Given the fact that our experience/knowledge is always limited and also our mind and intellect is not the same as anyone else, why unnecessarily get into someone else’s life?

      All that I am saying is – don’t influence others or don’t try to live through others by imposing your ideas on them.. Let them live on their own with their own individuality and character. Let them experience their life on their own! And even if they expect you to advice, in my opinion, it is always better to equip them to make decisions for themselves rather than making them live in your shadow!

  2. girisopinion · · Reply

    Well I feel that listening to advice is fine as long as you make an informed decision. We should not take all advices seriously but have to listen to people with experiance. Whether we take their advice or not is based on an induvidual level. But yeah certain people can irritate you with some unwanted advice, from which you have to stay away though :).

    1. Well.. talking about listening, I too believe that one must listen carefully to his surrounding. You can get solution to your life problem even from a small kid! So, I am FOR listening and NOT FOR advising.

      You might even listen to bad, unsolicited and unwanted advices but listening doesn’t mean that you have to really follow them! 😉

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